one whole month of holiday ended 2 weeks ago and im back in sch alr
the only thing i cant stand now is how we didnt talk at all. perhaps you are still mad at those messages “i” sent.
i no longer have anymore feeling for you. i mean when i try to show my feelings,you didnt care so i will just stop all those. i have gone used to you being such a wooden block with no emotions. i’m also tired of you being there for you even when you dont need anything
i dont wish to talk to you anymore
i dont wish to see you anymore
i dont wish to care for you anymore
i dont wish to think of you anymore
i dont wish to have you in my life anymore
so many ‘i dont wish’ s but my heart still tells me a small portion of me actually want to let you be part of me. but i know that can be me
i’m just gonna say bye to all those “happy memories” that i once had with you and continue my life with the appearance of new friends
can this get any worse? we havent been talking more than 3 days? but whats ahead is even worst. we wont be seeing each other for a month so does that mean we wont be talking at all
i want to start a convo with you but i feel like i’m bothering you plus on the surface, it seems like we dislike each other alot. when i talk to you, i guess you will be like fuck off qt everything i say
do you ever get that feeling when you miss someone so badly that you would do anything just see that person. no matter what he do,i cant stay angry at him for more than a day. without him doing anything, i find it amusing and always laughing at him. somehow all the millions of little things he do everyday makes me fall in love with him. he is my main source of happiness and anger. he never fails to make me laugh each day. everyday we argue. we joke. we laugh. from strangers, we became friends. from friends, we became frenemies (friend + enemies). friend because we know each other and enemies because we hate each other and never say anything positive to each other. even my fav seatmate said that it’s like a love-hate relationship between us. this may be true and may not be, but no matter what we are still friends right?
We can never be together right? no matter what happens, we won’t be together based on our current status. you can be understanding and patient at times but why must you be mean and bully me. even when we sit in threes, my partner actually not talk to me just because of you.
You mean so much yet so little to me. you are the one who brighten up my gloomy days, make me laugh just because of your “deathly” stares and your going-to-cry faces :) you are also the one who made me angry and irritated at the same time. But yet you are nothing to me when school ends and i don’t see your face at all.
Is making me angry your daily task? calling me stupid ass retarded girl?? is it because u want me to call you stupid ass retarded boy too? it’s cute if we call each other that but still NO! we are not at that stage yet. But we can be friends, right? See how long we’ve known each other and we seem close in class. from strangers to friends to frenemies now. it only took us 4 months to become like this.
The feeling of being shipped together by friends 😞 we seem like we hate each other but yet we look so close during lessons. we play. we argue. we talked alot. this is i’ll call a love-hate relationship. hehe 😄😄
All the fun moments we had tgt. i was snatching your water bottle and everyone around us are like so serious doing their work. Drawing logarithm graph with my ruler because you will never ever have a ruler by bending it but not to the extent od breaking. Eating food during lessons when we are not supposed to and we don’t share with others at all. You telling me that you will go toilet at (time) randomly during lessons. You asking me to help you to refill waterbottle and I’ll refill it to the brim so water would overflow and cause a mess at your table.
The most fascinating and amazing thing between us was the coincidentally excellent chemistry. i still remember you dropping shaz’s watch ⌚ and when she questioned us, we said no at the same time. The next question totally showed our chemistry. shaz asked ,”so what dropped?” without any hesitation, we said the pen✏ unanimously.
Does all these show any future of us? Your clique considered us being tgt and call me your girlfriend. whenever i call you when you talking to your clique, they will be like your girlfriend calling you. i’m definitely no okay with all this girlfriend thing but i can tolerate all the other funny “teasings”
Oh well, i’ll just wish that we can stay like this right?
more than friends, less than lovers